Been a long time

 I guess I haven't used this in quite awhile. So much has happened. I left Scott in 2022. I went with Jolie to Europe in June 2022. While I was there, I Facetimed Beau Holden from the Eiffle Tower. I was told by Jolie's friend's dad, "you know you are going to get divorced, right?" I don't think I fully realized it yet. 

What finally broke me was the night when Jason Holtzclaw came over wanting to borrow money. I told Scott not to give it to him, knowing the last time he did, he didn't use it for tires for his truck. Jason has a drug problem (maybe now he's sober, not sure). Scott took him out and got wasted. I went to bed since I had to work the next day. That night, Kristina called me asking if she could come over. I said I was in bed, but she could go meet Scott and Justin up at Twenty Mile Tavern.

I got woken up around 3 am by Scott asking me to go upstairs to sleep because he and Jason wanted to mess around. I told him to get the fuck out. They went into the office. I heard what sounded like them planning to have sex. Scott objected that he wanted to get dressed up first. Jason told him no and he had wanted this for a long time. I was at first worried about Scott, but then it seemed like he was enjoying it. I had the the thought that I now need to worry about getting Hep C and shoved condoms under the door. Then I went upstairs and got in bed with Jaden. I couldn't sleep though.

I heard Jason fumbling around in the kitchen and then glass breaking. I went to check what happened. Jason was naked and standing in broken glass. I reached for his hand and pulled him out. I got him on the couch and asked him what he was doing. He said he was hungry. I made him a sandwich. He started crying. He said he wants to die. He told me he would do anything for me. I said, "I want you to live." He then said that was too hard. I got him tucked in on the couch.

Meanwhile, Scott was in the bathroom. Then he went downstairs to get dressed as Serena. I went in the bathroom and smelled poop. Scott was cleaning out his anus and left poop in the bathtub. I cleaned it and scrubbed it because stress sends me into a cleaning frenzy. Then I heard Scott coming up the stairs in high heeled boots. 

I stopped him and told him to stay away from Jason. He said he wanted to hang out with Jason. I told him no. He then accused me of wanting Jason for myself and that I was trying to fuck him. I told him to go downstairs. I was so angry, I grabbed him by the throat and growled at him to stay away. He said, "ow, you're hurting me." I went downstairs with him. I asked what was he thinking, messing around with Jason with no condom. He then asked me why I sent Kristina to find them because now Roman is pissed at him. He kept trying to change the subject. I kept trying to bring him back to the fact that he had sex with Jason without a condom. Scott said, "I didn't have sex with him, but lots and lots of guys have fucked me." I then pulled out my phone and pressed record, asking him to say it again. He wouldn't. He just threw his arm over his face. I said, "How many guys have you fucked?" He said, "maybe one or two." I gave up. He passed out.

I couldn't sleep because I was so angry. I packed a bag and went to my office to sleep. I tried to sleep at least a little on my couch because I had to work in the morning. It was difficult because there are so many weird noises in that place. 

I got up the next day to work on my laptop from my office for Happier Living. The last client I had was Allan, who is gay. I asked him about prep for women. When we got finished, I started having a panic attack. I called Beau, who was camping for the weeekend. I asked if I could come to his campsite. I just couldn't go home. Although, we did mess around some, we didn't have sex.

The next day, I went home but that was the beginning of the end with Scott.

Here I am now. I moved in with Beau in October 2022 into a one bedroom apartment at Sterling Lakes. A year later, I bought a house, 4155 Spring Mill Way.